10/28/24, Anxiety, Artifacts, Amber Light!

Hey, another post! Been a while huh? I'm really tired as of late, my cat went missing and it's so hard to keep up with school. I can't do my AI song assignment because I don't know the intructions and I'm too scared to ask. I saw KD14 on saturday and it was the best concert of my life. I'm so glad it happened. I've also been posting disconnected thoughts on bluesky. I like here more.
I'm starting the martian in class for our sci fi unit and it's fun! I love movies that have some form of escapism, whether good or bad. achoo. I'm doing spanish 3 work and it's tough but I gotta work!! Wish me luck everyone.
Hi Corv talked 2 me an so did August n I feel better. If you read all the nonsense below the pudding it is okayyy I'll be okayyyy

bunny pudding jiggling on a plate

My girlfriend has been mad at me because of some self coping stuff and I just wish I could be normal y'know. My november sickness is already starting and I don't want it to spread to her. I'm so sorry evie. I keep not turning in work, i keep not doing anything. I shouldn't have continued school. none of this will matter if i just dissapear. I'm already starting to go back to my stims where i hit myself. im so pathetic i cant do this.
i think im going to do my yearly suicide plan. after the 15th because i want to celebrate that with august and i want to celebrate me and evies anniversary. my mom and brothers birthdya is on the 18th so it'll have to be after that too. i think the 22cnd would be good. at least it's something to look fowards to. im probably nto even going to do it anyways. i know it gets better but going through this is torture. making my girlfriend go through it is worse. i have to do work in spanish and o dpmt lmpw if i can. i shouldve died i should just die i cant do this
i cant tell august hes so tired already and evie will blame herself. i cant tell anyone really, they'll just worry. only you all will know. a secret between us ♥
i cant stop hitting my head or pulling my hair. im so tired. i think im cutting when i get home. im sorry
funny that my suicide is a mouthwashing refrence and my girlfriend wont know cuz she didnt play it. kinda sillyyy. also im not jimmy im curly or anya and i hate curly.